False Sophistication

I’m totally posting somebody else’s blog post for this blog post.  It’s just too good.  This is “The Heart Knows The Truth” by Donald Miller.  You can tell my favorite point he makes by the title I chose.  You can either go to the link, or read it below:

I’m working on a friends book at a restaurant down in San Diego, and, even as I type there’s a young woman sitting at the table next to me who is talking to another woman who seems to be her mentor. The younger woman is mentally challenged. She speaks in loud, straight sentences that mostly communicate facts: this coco is hot. This floor is scratched. I like the sunshine.

I’m fascinated, though. I’m loving it, actually. I know I’m wrong to be listening in on somebody else’s conversation, but how can I not? I appreciate the simplicity and even the beauty of her awareness of herself, of what she likes, of what is good, and even of what isn’t. She thinks decaf coffee is dumb. And it is, isn’t it?

What got me, though, was when she started talking about relationships. She told her mentor about a girl who didn’t like her. She said this girl had hurt her feelings. When the mentor asked why, what it was that hurt her feelings, the young woman didn’t accuse the girl of maliciousness or justify her anger or even repeat whatever the comment was that caused the pain. The young woman just told the plain, straight, truth: I want to be her friend but she doesn’t want to be mine. She went on, I’d like her to be my friend. I think I’m a good friend.
Talk about the real language of a real heart. Talk about truth telling. I don’t know where my heart learned to translate it’s sentiments into such false sophistication, but after hearing this conversation, I think false sophistication is akin to lying, and I don’t think lying is the right way to get what you want. I think there’s a good chance this girl is going to get the friendships she wants. Who wouldn’t want to be friends with somebody this honest?

So next time somebody says “why do you not like that that guy?” maybe I’ll be honest and just say “Because I want him to respect me but he doesn’t” or some such truth. I wonder what my world would start to look like if I stopped covering things up with distraction and manipulation and spin?



2 thoughts on “False Sophistication

  1. Lisbeth, It sounds to me like you are already in the world of straight talking. You talk straight from the heart, write well and notice beauty. Perfect! I really like your blogging.

  2. Why, thank you Jane! I’m not as much of a straight talker as I’d like to be, but I’m praying for the grace to be better. Thank you for your compliments and for reading!

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